Author Topic: Le Schtroumpfs  (Read 1951 times)

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Offline The Muffin Man

Le Schtroumpfs
« on: January 24, 2008, 07:57:54 pm »
This is an essay I had to write for my composition class... of course I had to bend reality and all things non-awesome to make an awesome story. Anyways, I decided to post it here. Here you girls go:


Hello, there. Instead of writing why I should get an A, I decided to write a story about perseverance. It relates to persevering for an A, in a way.

Once, several thousand years ago, there was a small mystical race of miniature humanoids. These humanoids were called a “Les Schtroumpfs”, which means in our language “Smurfs”.  Their skin color was blue, and their height was about that of three apples stacked on top of each other. The smurfs  rarely had any disturbances in their calm little town of Smurfsville, but one day an evil villain came to town under the disguise of a teacher. Le Schtroumpfeur de Bijoux was his name, and his lack of mudkips made him very hostile towards the school children. One such child was little Taalstrijd, and he had a knack for not being able to achieve an A. One day, Le Schtroumpfeur de Bijoux asked little Taalstrijd to write an essay on why he should get an A. Poor little Taalstrijd had such a hard time trying to achieve an A, and thoughts about his life flashed before him as he thought about being able to get an A. He explained to his teacher “I was abused all my life and told even my best wasn't good enough. My father used to lock me in the closet if I got anything less than an A. Now whenever I get less than an A it brings back nightmares of those times. And I just found out a couple days ago that he escaped from the county jail. What if he finds out I didn't get an A on this paper?!”  Le Schtroumpfeur de Bijoux simply replied with an evil laugh, for evil he was. Tallstrijd ran home and told his mother what had happened. His mother listened thoughtfully and replied with a simple step system for her child. The system was as follows:

1.   Get a fellow student to write the paper for you.
2.   Beat him if he doesn’t.
3.   Steal his lunch money.
4.   ?????
5.   PROFIT!!

Little Taalstrijd was excited when his mother gave him this step system, and he went out and did it immediately. Unfortunately for little Taalstrijd, he wasn’t quite as big as the other kids so he wasn’t able to beat any of them up. Fortunately for him, he found a tutor, Le Muffin de Man, that helped him write his essay. On the due date for the paper, Taalstrijd ran up to the school house to bring in his paper. He was very nervous about turning this paper in, for if he didn’t make an A who knows what would happen to him? When it was his turn to receive his grade, Taalstrijd slowly walked up to the desk. To his surprise, when the chair turned around, the principal Snowman was sitting there with his paper! “Where did Le Schtroumpfeur de Bijoux go?” asked Taalstrijd. Snowman grinned back and replied “Well, we found out how evil he was and kicked him out. Now then, here is your grade Tallstrijd!” He took the paper from the principal and to his delight, he got an A! “Yipee!” he screamed. He ran home and showed his mom his wonderful grade, and they all lived happily ever after and Le Schtroumpfeur de Bijoux was never seen again.

Offline chronolink

Le Schtroumpfs
« Reply #1 on: January 24, 2008, 10:16:26 pm »
I don't get it


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Re:Jew Tee ( From: TheUnderTaker )
and your a bigger twat now than before now tiger off and leave me alne you turtle ass tigerer
TheUnderTaker is a member of the Administration group and has 6 posts.
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Offline The Muffin Man

Le Schtroumpfs
« Reply #2 on: January 24, 2008, 10:41:13 pm »
Quote from: chronolink
I don't get it

I had to write a 300 word essay on "Why i should get an A in the class"

That was the result.

Offline Mack the Blacksmith

Le Schtroumpfs
« Reply #3 on: January 25, 2008, 03:48:33 am »
... Watch her fail you?


[!--quoteo(post=0:date=:name=Chronolink on Vent)--][div class='quotetop']QUOTE (Chronolink on Vent)[div class='quotemain'][!--quotec--]Calling people hawks now? Jeez, going too far.[/quote]
 

Offline Snowman

Le Schtroumpfs
« Reply #4 on: January 25, 2008, 06:26:26 am »
Id have to kill her :-)

Offline Kaios

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Le Schtroumpfs
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2008, 06:44:42 am »
The fact that you had to write about why you deserve an A made this story funny.
(Insert witty signature here)

Offline Mack the Blacksmith

Le Schtroumpfs
« Reply #6 on: January 25, 2008, 06:45:23 am »
indeed.


[!--quoteo(post=0:date=:name=Chronolink on Vent)--][div class='quotetop']QUOTE (Chronolink on Vent)[div class='quotemain'][!--quotec--]Calling people hawks now? Jeez, going too far.[/quote]