An xsabbath production in daunting memory of Tilur. Any events that took place in RPGWO therof is ENTIRELY coincidental and all characters are ENTIRELY FICTIONAL. To my wife Darla Who stole Tilur’s damon Bow? Nobody knows that, but he did place the blame on Pure Chaos although it was last in possession of either Someguy or Ead (cant remember lol). This story aims to find out, or not. One day the fat sage Chronolink was walking around liberty with nothing to do. Along his travels he saw Pure Chaos sitting on a rock holding his damon spear looking a bit depressed. Pure Chaos: Hi Chrono Chronolink: You look upset Pure, what’s wrong? Pure Chaos: It’s my relationship with Tilur, I thought we had something special going but he accused me of stealing his damon Bow now he hates me. Chronolink: Ph33r not young Pure, I shall uncover the truth. I shall go to the PYR8 basecamp and talk to Tilur himself. Pure Chaos: You might be a fat sage, but you cannot get near PYR8 members. Chronolink: non the less I shall try. Pure Chaos: Here, take meep along with you, he’s the best blue back spider there is Chronolink: Okay, I’ll do my best Pure Chaos: Good luck fat sage Chronolink: Come along meep -Meep follows Chronolink to the PYR8 basecamp- -As Chronolink approaches the PYR8 basecamp Evilistickness is first to approach him- Evilistickness: I’m the best here now you stay away -Chronolink cuts Evilistickness up with his sword- Chronolink: n00b -Second to approach Chronolink is Axeman- -Meep and Chronolink take turns beating Axeman 6ft under the ground- Axeman: -.- -Rin, is third to try to take Chrono, he fires an arrow but hits meep instead- -Meep lies there bleeding to death- Chronolink: You bastard you killed meep Rin: All your base are belong to Drace, -Drace then acts like a REAL NINJA and plays a GUITAR SOLO- -Chronolink shakes his head and throws a shrokrim at him slicing his head off- -Wondering what all the fuss is about Someguy walks out- Chronolink: You are no-one special you are just Some Guy Someguy: You’re right I guess, I shall think about this high in the mountains -Last to approach before Tilur is Nathan Havok- Nathan: You are like the best Pker ever, I R H4X!!!11 -Chronolink throws Nate the un1x cube- Chronolink: Here, play with this, match up 10,000 lines of scripting in the shell and tell me how it’s different to a program written in C -Tilur approaches- Tilur: Chrono how could you? She was 13 years old. You stupid whore -Chronolink repeatedly hits Tilur with his sword to no avail- -Tilur blinds Chronolink and begins to smack him to death- Chronolink: OUCH, IAAR, it hurts but it’s good -Nate comes back and puts the un1x cube in Chronolink’s pocket- Nate: xXNoPoeticDeviceXx was like the best hacker ever -Nate throws Chronolink down a hole into a trap room- Chronolink: Darn, no way out of here -Archmage Vex busts the wall down- Vex: Seksilicious Chronolink: This isn’t your story get back to phobos where you will continually get laid -Vex, feeling Vexed by this, runs away- -Chronolink walks through the opening and finds Ead there- Chronolink: So it was you? Ead: This isn’t what it looks like….. Chronolink: No I don’t mean you jacking off, I mean the damon Bow Ead: Oh, that, here it is, now don’t tell anyone about my right-hand exploits -Chronolink leaves to rejoin Pure Chaos- Pure Chaos: You bring me good news fat sage? Chronolink: Yes, here is the bow. Ead had it -Tilur comes running across the hills- Tilur: Run to the hills……. Run for your life….. -Pure Chaos impales Tilur with his damon Spear- Pure Chaos: I DIDN’T STEAL YOUR FRIKKEN BOW, OMFG I DIDN’T STEAL IT. FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME OK? -Chronolink drags Pure off Tilur’s corpse before he tried to hump it and they walk hand-in-hand into the sunset- Chronolink: You know Pure? One day I’m gona be just like you Pure Chaos: Not a chance child, you see; in this insane world you gota play like non-stop 24:7, once you become good maybe we can have some kinda get together or something, but you have a lot to learn first. -As they walk into the sunset Tilur’s eyes open- Tilur: Did they think I would go down so easily….. AHAHAAHH w00t an EMU